How to Kill a Camel

How to Kill a Camel

Camilla loved her master. He wasn't perfect, but she knew he loved her, as well. One evening, the master did not come home.  Camilla heard the other humans talking about a terrible accident and knew she would never see him again. She wondered what would become of her. The other masters cared for her until, finally, a new master took her to a new home. For a while, Camilla was happy in her new life. She carried her load, eager to please and help her new master. As she got older, her load became harder to bear. Her master was unhappy that she wasn't as fast and sturdy. She did her best to keep up, but her master grew surly and gave her more and more to carry. One day, he became angry and shouted at Camilla. She was sure things would be better the next day. But things never did get better. Camilla's master gave her even more to carry and shouted at her when she stumbled. One day, as he was loading her packs, she fell to the ground. Her master shouted at her, but she could not get up. Her back was broken. When the master realized this, he said he was sorry and rubbed her neck, whispering comforting words, promising he would take better care of her from now on. Camilla's heart was filled with joy. She was happy again, knowing her master really did love her.  The master gave Camilla some time to heal before  putting her back to work. She didn't feel completely well, but she trusted her master and willingly carried his load. For a while, Camilla was happy. But, gradually, the master became more and more displeased with her weaknesses. He gave her more and more to carry until, once again, she collapsed. Once again, the master was sorry and promised to take better care of her. And so it went, the same cycle, year after year. As time went by, Camilla grew weaker and weaker and the master became more and more disgusted with her weakness, even though he knew he had caused it by not taking proper care of her. Finally, Camilla became too weak to carry the extra loads. She tried and tried, but it was no use. Her heart broke whenever she saw her master's kindness toward the other camels. She longed for a kind word and gentle touch, but knew, by now, that it would never come again from her master. How she wished another master would take her and let her live out her final days in peace and happiness. But she had grown old and was broken down from the years of abuse. She was no longer the beautiful, well-groomed animal her first master had loved so much. She dreamed of walking into the desert and never coming back to the master who now despised her. But she knew, all too well, that she was no longer capable of fending for herself. She was completely dependent on her master for food and shelter. On the day she admitted to herself that there would be no more happiness for her, something in Camilla died. Her only hope, each day, is that her master will not notice her. She stands quietly in her stall. She hears her master talking to the other camels. It doesn't hurt quite so much any more. When he comes with her food, she tries not to make a sound, lest he be reminded of her worthlessness and shout at her again. It won't be much longer, she knows. She is old and will soon die. Then there will be peace.